Latest update for May

Hi Everybody!
I'm going to give you the news on what has been happening here at home this month. Thank God I have been keeping a journal for Sara so I can look through it and tell you what has been happening! I've been keeping quite busy with all 4 of our kids. Especially now with the weather being so nice. Working on attaching and bonding also takes up a large amount of time. She has my undivided attention all the time. The days seem to fly by. These are things that I've been doing to promote attachment:
Lots of hugs & kisses all day and everyday. Holding Sara in my arms as much as possible. Playing baby games with her like peek-a-boo and pat-a-cake. Rubbing cream on each other. She loves this and I never had such soft skin! Letting her play with my hair(brushing and putting barettes in my hair). Naming the parts of each others face and touching each one. Pointing out what we have alike , same hair and eye colour, we both have the same necklace, we both have the same clothes items, some of the same foods we like etc. etc. Singing to her. Telling her she is a good girl and a beautiful girl. Telling her things like, my darling child, you are my sunshine, you are so smart. I also get her to do simple tasks with me, like, emptying the dishwasher together and helping me put clothes in the washer and cleaning up together. I then thank her for helping me and give her lots of praise. She usually goes on saying that she is doing it just like mamma. I have done "holding time" about 6 times now with great after results. I am also the only one who feeds her, brings her to the washroom, bathes her, kisses her boo-boos and holds her. Actually this was the pediatrician's orders. He said, because of her age (not a baby) I must be the only one to do everything for her for the next 6 months. This is vitally important for a good attachment or their can be problems when she gets older. That means no day-care or activity classes either. I've also spoken and explained this to our other 3 children and they are doing pretty good. I've also explained this to my mother and my sister who are over often. They understand but I know its hard sometimes and I also hate to have them hold back. They give her just enough attention that it isn't too much.She is a delightful and kind little girl. I am so proud of her. It is trully amazing to me how well she is adapting after all she's gone through in the past and the all the changes her life has taken. Its like she has always been here.

This is what has been going on this month:
Friday, May 5th
Today was the first time I brought her with me in the grocery store. We were there for about 30 minutes. I sat her in the cart which Sara thought was just great. I could see that she was amazed at the amounts of food there was in one place. She kept pointing out the different things she recognized with excitment. She was alittle shy with the cashier when she said hello to her. She did say bye-bye to her and waved when we were leaving. I thought she did pretty good. There were no tantrums or signs of over stimulation. After we were done I thought I get her to try McDonalds. It was lunch time. I decided to go through the drive-through and eat in the car together. I think the grocery store was enough for one day. Sara took a couple of bites of her hamburger and didn't want anymore. She loved the fries! I don't know anyone who doesn't like McDonalds fries! She has also begun to repeat alot of english words. She already understands quite a bit of what I am saying to her in english.
Sat. May 6th
We went to our campsite where we have our 5th wheeler parked. This is a wonderful Park. Lots of activities for young and old. I looked up how to say camping in Russian. I explained to her that we would be sleeping there tonight and tommorrow we would go back home. I think she got alittle confused at first and thought that we were just packing and moving to another place. She went for a nice little walk in her stroller with her sister Marina. Sara seemed to be enjoying herself. At night time we went to our friends campsite because they had a fire going. She really liked sitting by the fire and eating some peanuts. Everyone met her there and thought she was just adorable. It was a little too overwhelming for her after a while. She was getting alot of hugs and kisses from everyone and I thought she was being too friendly too soon with our friends who were just strangers to her. At one point she was reaching for me then 2 seconds later she would reach for a friend of mine and then she would run to Papa. Thats when I thought I'd better take her back to our camper where it was quiet and she could wind-down. I didn't end up saying anything to our friends because I thought they might not understand and be hurt about holding back attention like that till alittle later. I'll just have to give her extra hugs & kisses and holding tommorrow.
Sun. May 7th
Today we've been home for one week! So far so good.
Late this afternoon we got a house full of people. Everyone came all at once. I was worried that it would be too over-whelming for her. She received lots of hugs & kisses and also got held a few times. For the most part she played with my friends 2 little girls. One is 2.5 and the other is 4 yrs of age. They got along great. She had alot of fun with them. It was nice to see everyone again and chit-chat.
Sat. May 13th
Today we visited our priest at the Roman Catholic church in the near by town. We went to meet with him because we wanted to discuss Sara's Baptism. He asked for a copy of her birth and adoption certificates. We've decided to have her baptized on June 11th. We will have celebration for her at our home afterwards.
Tues. May 16th
Sara's eating alot better now. She is tasting everything. Sometimes she asks to try things. She loves her fruit. Especially oranges! She likes this better than candy. She has been giving me hugs and kisses for no reason. I also did holding-time. She was kicking and screaming for about 40 minutes before she calmed down and fell asleep. After that I felt like I just had good work-out. She is a very strong little girl! She has also begun to regress. She is drinking milk out of a baby's bottle. I try to give it to her instead of her holding it by herself which is what she wants to do. I then say to her that I'm the mamma and she is mamma's baby. This seems to work and she begins to pretend to be a baby.
Well I've got to go now! I will continue updating very soon!
Bye for now,
Gina

We are finally Home!!!

Greetings to you all!
We are now home as many of you already know. We are doing very well. Sara is adjusting amazingly well. We hope she continues to do so. Before I let you know details on how she is doing at home I would like to tell you how things went just before we came home.
On Sat. April 29th we had our driver Nicolai come pick us up at around 10 am. We had called Sasha to arrange for a driver that could drive us around Kiev for some site-seeing. We wanted to see some of the beautiful churchs and take many pictures of Kiev. First we went to St. Andrew's square. St. Andrews Church was amazing to look at. There was cobble-stone everywhere. There was also a small outdoors market. All the booths had many many hand-made traditional Ukrainian items. This is the place to go if your looking to purchase authentic Ukrainian things for souvenirs and your little ones keep-sakes. Many of the vendors spoke english and were very friendly. We even bargained with a few. There were hundreds of Matrioshka dolls! They were are different sizes and one was always more beatiful then the next. We bought Sara one and she just loved it. She asked me acouple of times, "Etta moy?". (Is this mine?) I kept reassuring her that yes it was hers. She gave me the biggest smile! She carried it around in her own bag. We took a little walk around and there were also a few musicians playing their instruments and a donation container on the ground. My favourite was this guy who was dressed in the traditional Ukrainian outfit and playing the "bandolin". He was singing an old Ukrainian song. We stood there for awhile and listened and video taped him. We also saw the Dnipr river, the inside of St. Micheal's church and the Mosuleum. The Mosuleum was amazing. This was built in honour of the 200,000 Ukrainian people who starved to death many years ago. It was quite the place to see! It also had an excellent view of the city. At around 1pm we headed back to the apartment and had some lunch and we rested up before heading out again.
Afterwards at around 2-2:30 pm, we met with our friend & her sister in front of T.G.I. Friday's. We hugged each other as soon as we saw each other and congratulated each other on our children. They had adopted a 17 month old boy with the most beautiful dark long eyelashes I ever seen! We had a lovely day together chitchatting about how our journeys went. We walked down Main St. Kiev again as the street was blocked off from traffic. We also walked through a beautiful park that was nearby. The weather was fantastic! It was sunny and I saw many bright red tulips in bloom. I couldn't resist taking pictures. Sara was in her new stroller which she willingly got into. She was loving every minute of it. She was quite amused with the many people walking around.By the end of the afternoon we had walked back again and we said our goodbyes and wished each other a good trip home and good luck at home. As soon as we returned to the apartment Philip fell asleep and Sara fell asleep in the bedroom. I didn't feel like sleeping so I started to collect our things and start packing. First thing I made sure of were the adoption documents packed first with our passports & tickets in our carry-on. Afterwards Philip & I did all the packing. Sara was very excited to be packing suitcases. We didn't want to leave anything for the next morning so we could enjoy our last morning in the apartment. We didn't sleep very well because we were too excited. I gave Sara a bath which she just loves. She like a fish in the water. At 10:15am Nicolai and the landlady showed up. We paid the landlady and even gave her alittle bonus. She was very pleasant and we tried to converse alittle. We got to the airport at about 11am. We went to pick up Sara's ticket first and then we waited along time before we could get checked in. We were first in line but they made us wait for 2 hrs !! Everyone was so frustrated including Sara. She was so good considering the situation and her age. She got to the point where she couldn't stay in the stroller anymore. So many times I walked back up & down the hallway and 5 or 6 times up & down 2 flights of stairs. I was trying to get her tired so she would sleep on the plane. Thank God I had packed some cookies and pistachio nuts and water in her back-pack! We finally got checked in around 1-1:30 pm! The flight went very well. Sara was so amazed when she looked out the window and saw we were moving and then going up! All I heard was, wow! Soon after she started crying because she was so tired and all she wanted was Papa. Philip was getting alittle frustrated because he couldn't calm her down. I gave Philip a lolli-pop to give to her because her ears were probably bothering her. She had it in her mouth for 5 min and passed out. She slept most of the time and when she was awake she stood up and played with her toys or visited me accross the aisle. She loved the bathroom! I think because it was little. Before we new it we were in Toronto, Canada! What a great feeling! I was getting so nervous and anxious to see our kids. We got our luggage and went to see an immigration officer to sign papers for Sara and was told that we could apply for her Canadian passport right away. So then she will have 2 passports. We started walking and saw "our crowd" waving frantically at us from behind the glass! I was holding Sara and the look on her face was priceless!! She had this look saying,"Wow! everyone is waving at me?!!". Then we were out and our 3 other kids ran up to us and we were crying tears of joy in the middle of hugs and kisses! Sara recongnized her brothers and sisters right away. More hugs and kisses their too! Sara was just fine with everyone saying hello with her. She was being shy. she started to smile when my good friend Patricia gave her a pink bear and my sister-in-law gave her a doll. Then came the balloons! She loved those! Good choice Wanda! We were so exhausted but we were so happy to see everyone again. We appreciate and Thank everyone who came to the airport!! By this time it was about 10pm or so. On our way home Sara had a blast with our oldest son Anthony & the balloons. When we got home there was a beautiful welcome home sign that the kids made and another on Sara's & Marina's bedroom door reading,"This is your new bedroom!". As soon as we walked into the house Sara gave our little dog a big hug. She followed him everywhere. She just adores him. The kids had alot of fun together before heading off to bed in the wee hours of the morning! I was surprised that Sara insisted she sleep in her own bed with Marina. They share a bedroom with 2 single beds. She's been sleeping there ever since.
I will tell you more about how our home life is coming along on my next post!
BYE FOR NOW!!
Gina Fortini

Update for the end of April

Hello everyone!
I apoligize for not posting anymore. Right after my last post, we got incredibly busy running around doing the last of the paperwork before we could take Sara out of the orphanage. We didn't have time to go to the internet cafe. When we finally got home to Canada, our computer was down for a week.
About 4 days before we took her out of the orphanage, we had to take her out for a passport picture. This was her first time in the "masheena" (car). You could tell she was a little worried . As we climbed into the car she scrambled onto my lap. She began to wimper alittle and our facilitator, Alexander talked to her and assured her everything is alright. He was great with her and a big help many times. As we bumped along the road, her eyes became saucers. She looked around at all the people and cars in amazement! We all had fun watching her. When we entered the photo place she began to cry. I think she is scared of doctors because everytime she saw someone in a white lab-coat she'd cry. I think she thought she was at a hospital. Again, Alexander talked to her and calmed her down and we got great pass-port pictures. We also had to do some shopping for her. We bought her some clothing , a couple of pair of shoes and an umbrella stroller. I had brought some clothes from home and I always seemed to be drawn to size 2 or 3yrs. Which is what I brought!! It was totally meant to be! She is exactly the size of a normal 3 yr old. She is not behind in weight or size at all. I also prepared gifts for all the caregivers. Alex suggested money instead because they appreciate this very much. I had brought lots of little thankyou cards and wrote "Thankyou for everything", in cyrillic. They appreciated this very much. A couple of days before we took Sara out, we had missed our morning visit because we were trying to obtain her new birth certificate. We later found out that Sara had a tantrum, screaming, "Where is mamma & papa?!! I want mamma & papa!!!!". She had been waiting for us to arrive. At this point she has definitely attached to Papa first. She sometimes pushes me away. Philip felt very bad for me. When she does this, Papa scolds her by telling her ,"No Nastya! Mamma cry! and then she will come and give me a hug. But sometimes I could tell that she was doing it so she would not disappoint Papa. It hurt alittle, but I understand that she can only attach to one person at a time. Right now it's Philip. Plus, this is exactly what I had prayed for before. That our child would attach to him first. I was afraid he would take it to personally if she pushed him away for to long. He doesn't have my tremendous patience and optimism. I'm very happy that she attached to him first. He is loving every minute of it and can't understand why she is so attached to him so much and not me.
We had also gone to the travel agency to book airline tickets with "aerosvit airlines". We were to board the plane in Donestk and fly for 1 hour to Kiev. We were to leave on Saturday evening at 8 pm.On Friday afternoon, we visited with the Orphanage Director. We brought her the orphanage donation and a gift for her. She thanked us many times. We had a small conversation and I complimented her on a well-run and beautiful orphanage. She gave us the pictures she promised to give to us. Those were the pictures we saw of her just before we met her in the office. We had did this instead of tommorrow because she would not be in on Saturday. This was Easter weekend here. We had our Easter the week before. We would be picking Sara up the day before the Ukranian Orthodox Easter. Alex had told us that Sara's name Anastasia, means "resurection". So its seems so appropriate to leave on this day. On Friday evening Philip and I were busy packing all our suitcases as much as we could, as we knew the next day would be very busy. The next day we would be finally taking Sara out of the orphanage!! WOOHOO!!! I picked out an adorable mint green dress with pink and purple felt flowers on it. I had a pink Winnie-the-Pooh spring jacket and a white embroidered hat with silk ribbons running through it. It was complete with pink leather "mary-jane" shoes.
On Saturday April 22, 2006 we first went to the passport office to pick up your new passport at 11 am. We then went to the grocery store to pick-up a bag full of lolli-pops for Sara's groupa. We had already given them 3 bags of necessities ( clothing, tooth-brushes, socks, toys, band-aids, gummi-bears and girls hair accessories) during our many visits and we wanted to give them one last treat. I will never forget the many times they screamed, Mamma mamma!!! when we would arrive on a visit or the hugs I got and their little faces looking out from behind the second-floor windows as we got out of the car. They were all beautiful and healthy little boys and girls. We finally arrived at the orphanage just after 12pm. The caregivers said you had just eaten lunch. One of them suddenly brought her out into the childrens "dressing-room", in her arms naked. We are not allowed to bring any of there clothes. She began to dress her as I passed her the clothes, one by one. When Sara was all dressed they said she looked like a doll and Sara insisted on looking in a mirror! Before we left I asked them some questions about her schedule and Alex translated for me. They also gave me the booklet that we had left for them to write farewell messages to Sara. Some of them also wrote down their address's. Now it was time to say good-bye, so I took some last pictures of her bed and where she ate etc. They were all saying their good-byes to Sara and a few of them were crying which made me cry too. It was a very touching moment that I will never forget. We are very very grateful that Sara was so well taken care of and so loved. Afterwards we went to our favourite restaurant, "Silvers" for one last time. This was Sara's first time in a restaurant. She started to cry alittle as we entered but Alex explained where we were and she relaxed. She ate some fresh veggies, apple-juice and bread. She was great. She was quite amused at how the waiter kept appearing with plates of food! When we got to our apartment she went exploring while one of us took turns watching her and finishing packing. Sara just loved flushing the toilet and turning the lights on&off! Next thing you know our driver Leo arrived and the boys were loading up the car. We told Sara it was time to go bye-bye and she ran to grab your jacket. We had a 2 hour car drive to Donestk. Sara was restless in the car and also slept part of the way. When we arrived Leo and I exchanged addresses. We had become good friends and we were very sad to say goodbye. We were all in tears as we hugged. We will never forget him. He really did take good care of us out of the goodness of his heart. I hope he knows that he helped make our trip wonderful.
Now it was just me, Philip, Sara and Alex waiting in the airport. Sara was exhausted and restless. All she wanted was Papa. She cried on the plane and slept for 20 min. The driver that drove us to Lugansk was waiting for us in Kiev. By this time it was late at night. He drove us to our apartment that Sasha had booked for us. We had to walk up 6 flights of stairs. Sara was passed right out and I put her right to bed. We were all exhausted. Alex stayed the night and explained that the next day he would be translating all the paperwork for us. Philip & I didn't sleep very much because it was our first time with Sara inbetween us. We had a great first day together. In the afternoon Sara had a nap. When she woke up, Philip, Sara and I and Alex went to a restaurant and then we walked down the Main St. of Kiev. They block off this street every Sat. & Sun. Lots of people walk and have a nice "leisure-time". There are also some musicians and exotic animals to take pictures with. Philip, Sara & I had our pictures taken with 3 little monkeys. Sara just loved it! Sasha had also come to visit before we went out.
That evening we said our goodbyes with Alex. He was leaving to be with family. Although he said he would like to come and see us before we left. He made such a difference in our stay in Lugansk. I wouldn't have wanted it any other way! We are really going to miss him.
On Wednesday we were with Sasha all day. First we went to visit the Canadian Embassy. We had to finish filling out the Sponsorship papers and papers for Sara's visa. A picture is needed for this and we had to get Sara's picture edited to a pure white background because it was beige. After Philip & I signed some papers, we were told to come back at 4pm and everything would be ready. While we waited we went to a near-by fancy restaurant. Philip had to help feed Sara and keep her busy. All she wants is Papa. I finally sat back and laughed. I said to Philip, "Now you know what I went through with our 3 kids at home, when they were little. All they wanted was mamma, mamma, mamma!! Philip's response was," Ya, but I don't have as much patience as you!" He said this with exasperation! Oh well! I said, laughing. Afterwards we finally received Sara's visa that needs to be signed infront of an immigration officer at the airport in Canada. This means we could have come home any time. We arrived in Kiev on March 27th. We found Sara at the NAC on the 28th. We met her on March 31st. We went to court on April 11th. We took her out of the orphanage on April 22nd. We received her visa on Wed. April 26th. The whole process took 4 weeks and 3 days. WOW! Thats pretty good actually. We ended up leaving on Sun. April 30th. On the Friday night before we left, we had dinner with Sasha at the italian restaurant we went to everyday. Its attached to T.G.I Fridays. We like it alot better. Food is great, english menus and the waiters speak english. We had a nice dinner and one of the other facilitators joined us. He came with us to our apartment and we gave him a gift in appreciation for all he had done for us. Thanks to him we have our Sara today! We hugged each other goodbye. We are so glad Sasha was our facilitator. He seems to be very well connected in the NAC.
During the week we were getting the opportunity to bond with Sara. We have been calling her Sara-Nastya alot. She repeats "Sara" all the time. She hadn't been eating to much because she has a runny nose and a cough. Plus this must be overwhelming for her. She likes to eat bananas, peach yogurt, tea biscuits or animal crackers, bread, apples, sweet tea, cucumbers and soup. I haven't figured out how she likes her kasha (oatmeal). She is also learning some english words very quickly. Philip has also, sort of, stepped aside alittle, so Sara & I can have some bonding time together. He doesn't want it to be too hard on her when we get home because I will be the one at home all the time. By the end of the week she wasn't pushing me away hardly at all. We had alot of fun together. Especially when I mention the bath. She loves it!On the first bath, she couldn't whip her clothes off faster! She was like a fish in the water! It was great! We also got in contact with the lady from Ottawa, Canada a few times on the phone. We had a very pleasant time with her and her sister on the first couple of days in Ukraine.She had adopted alittle boy from Kiev. She was accompanied by her sister on her journey. We decided to meet at T.G.I. Friday's and spend the afternoon together. We were dying to meet each others children!
I will tell you all about our meeting and our flight to Toronto, Canada on my next post!
Take care all!!